Writing for Men

I like to write erotica “for men”, whatever the hell that means.

I’ve always written stories for an audience of one person: me. My stories are my fantasies, or they are about emotions I want to explore, both comfortable and sometimes uncomfortable. My stories are also an expression of boredom, like masturbating on a lazy summer afternoon. There’s no point to it but it briefly feels good to indulge in purely selfish pleasure.

I found a writing partner online a few years ago. Several, in fact, but one that stuck. We role-played together, writing erotic stories for our own private enjoyment. I started this in secret, but ultimately admitted it to my husband, and as usual he was far too supportive. He encouraged me to continue, although if I’m being honest my husband’s approval took away some of the thrill for me.

I got to know one writing partner a little, and I found that it really turned me on to write for him. For someone who always wrote to please herself, this was a novel discovery. I found myself writing in ways I wouldn’t have on my own. My words pressed up against his in new ways, and he spread my creativity wide open. I wrote things that I knew he’d like, slutty characters, reluctant characters, characters who just wanted to suck cock all the time. He liked it, and I found a new thrill to know he liked it. New levels of meta-sluttiness.

My husband never read what I wrote, and he seemed utterly unconcerned about it. Not in the least jealous, which actually made me strangely jealous in response. Nature abhors a vacuum. It was as if I wanted him to react, to bounce off of me, to try to restrict me so that I could resist those restrictions. Or maybe I wanted him to want me all for himself. But we’ve talked about this in the past, and he has no problem sharing me. It’s not that he’s never been jealous, it’s that he kinda enjoys it, I think.

Meanwhile, I have learned that I kinda enjoy writing the sort of smut that guys would jerk off to, if in fact any man ever jerks off to mere words. It’s my way of being the ultimate slut: I can sleep with anyone and everyone, if only in my dreams.